The Interview

 I had the pleasure of being interviewed for the first time today by my lovely daughter Hailey. Hailey is 5 years old, and I think she did an excellent job interviewing me! Here is a little transcript of.....dun dun DUN!.......THE INTERVIEW.

H: What is your name?

M: Brianne

H: Brianne, what is your favorite compost?

Me: Compost?

H: Yes

Me: What is compost? (Obviously, I know what compost is, but I had no idea what she was thinking here...)

H: It's a different way to say like, like, (puts pencil in moutch while thinking) it's a different way to say magazine.

M: Oh, well, in that case, my favorite magazine is cozmo.

H: Cozmo? What's cozmo?

M: It's a magazine.

H: Ohhhhhh...okay...what is your sisters name?

M: I have 2 sisters their names are Dana and Katie.

H: Ok Katie, Dana, Katie...

H: What is your moms name?

M: My moms name is Bev.

H: Beth...

M: BEV

H: BEVVVVV...h-e-l-l-p-l.... what are your friends names?

M: Amber

H: Ammmmmber

M: Tim

H: Timmmm

M: Brittany

H: I got Brittany...ok that's all you need to ask... what's your husbands name?

M: Mel

H: Melvin? Is that right?

M: M-hmm

H: What isssss...ummm...hmmm...let me see...oh i know!

*enter desitin incident*

I look at Hailey...

H: I'm thinkin'.... I can't think of anything mommy! This is what i've got: friends, compost, all that.

All of a sudden:

H: What is your favorite book?!?!?! Tell me mommy....

M:I have a lot of favorite books.

H: Just tell me one.

M: The Giving Tree.

H: Okkkk p-i-n-g-o-p-n-i...What is your favorited Dad?

M: My favorite what?

H: Your favorite dad...your great, great, great, great dad...

M: My what?

H: (repeats) Is THAT your favorite dad? What kind of favorite dad do you like?

M: Um...I only have one dad.

H: You have a great, great (says great like 37 times) dad, you have a Melvin (which I think is hilarious because a Melving is a crotch wedgy aka camel toe...), and a Grandad,and a great great grandad and all those dads!

M: Yea but only one of those is my dad.

H: Just tell me.

M: My dad is my favorite dad.

H: p-n-o-p-n-t-o-p....now, let me think...what is your favorite movie?

M: Dawn of the Dead

H: OH MY GOD MOMMY!!!! Is it Dear John? (LMAO WTF?!)

M: Nooo, I said Dawn of the Dead.

H: o-n-p-o-p-n-n-a

long pause

H: okay...mumbles *alright*......what is your favorite, favorite house, what is your favorite house, your favorite house?

M: Umm...our house.

H: Oh, okayyyyy...okayyy...umm...(whispers something) hmm....(hi-pitch dodod odod do dodo I thought she was singing) hold on let me get this (answers phone carries on short conversation with imaginary caller mostly consisting of ok ok ok buh-bye says, "Sorry had to get a phone call from my daughter she is 16.") Okay, that is all today Brianne!!! Bye bye!!!!